A Hockey Cyborg?

As if Chicago hockey fans needed MORE reasons to dislike the Red Wings right now, we all have to wonder: is Nicklas Lidstrom a cyborg?!? AAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!

Carry on. Go Hawks.

Six Sleep Strategies

All too often, a good night's sleep eludes me. I lie awake thinking before finally drifting off. My furry little monsters wake me up at dawn, meowing and purring. Whatever the reason, I know I'm not alone: about 20% of us sleep less than six hours of sleep a night. So when I found this collection of "snooze strategies," I figured it would be worthwhile to pass it along. The article dissects some common sleep myths - like alcohol being a good sleep aid - and suggests ways to get better rest, like adjusting your eating schedule or changing the position of your pillow. Useful stuff, although I don't think the cats are going to give a hoot about my pillow placement. At least they're cute when THEY sleep:

Lost: Quick Thoughts

I have to be honest: I wanted to watch tonight's Lost season finale like a regular person, without taking notes and over-analyzing. So I did. But I wanted to put up a space where we could all express some immediate post-show thoughts. Here are just a few of mine, in no particular order:

Sawyer's heartbreak over losing Juliet was one of the most emotionally devastating things I've ever seen on this show.

If we don't find out why Jacob had contact with so many of our castaways off the island and what he was trying to accomplish with them, I will be very, very upset.

Good riddance, Phil.

Don't worry, Miles. I also thought that maybe Jack's actions were the actual cause of the incident. You are not alone. I am here for you.

So Richard knows what lies in the shadow of the statue: what language was he speaking, and what IS it?

This is at least the second time that a pivotal episode of Lost has been interrupted by severe weather alerts. What up with that?

OMG LOCKE WAS DEAD THE WHOLE TIME? WHO WAS THE GUY WITH JACOB IN THE SHOW OPEN? WHY DID HE NEED TO FIND A LOOPHOLE? WHY DID JACOB MAKE RICHARD IMMORTAL? WHY DO I HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL 2010 TO FIND OUT? WHY CAN'T I TURN OFF THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON?

Weird Beards... Kind Of

Happy Saturday. I'd like to thank the Trib's website for making this collection of "weird beards" one of the first things I saw this morning. As it turns out, most of the images don't feature true beards: picture #3 shows that crazy blond thing currently residing on the chin of Bobby Jenks, while #8 displays Ryan Theriot's wispy goatee. It's really a collection of weird facial hair, but that title wouldn't have rhymed. I don't blame you for the stretch, Tribune. I love a good rhyme as much as anyone.

Also, Jay Cutler should grow a beard. That would be SUPER SWEET.

Lost: Follow the Leader

• Previously on Lost: Ben killed Locke, but then he was alive again. "Dead is dead." My physicist had a plan to detonate the bomb and change the past, but then he died. Sniffle.
• IN THE PAST: Someone at Lost HQ hates me enough to open the episode at the moment of Daniel's death, but with more Jack and Kate! Kate thinks Daniel is crazy. Jack thinks this might be their chance to make things right. I briefly hope that Daniel won't die this time, but then he does. Jack gets his face beat in, which cheers me up. Also: Widmore.
• Ellie reads Daniel's journal and quickly realizes what she's done. Widmore brings Jack and Kate to their camp. Ellie asks for them to be put in her tent, telling Charles that despite appearances, they are not with Dharma. In the tent, Kate points out that she and Jack would never have met if the plane never crashed. She seems oddly fixated on the possibility of their relationship being wiped out instead of having to go to jail. Or maybe she's just playing him like a cheap alcoholic fiddle. Then Ellie arrives and makes me cry. She tells Jack that once upon a time, she met a man from the future who turned out to be her son. Jack says that setting off this bomb could undo what she did to him. Ellie agrees to take them to the bomb, which is buried under Dharmaville! Too bad Jack and Kate aren't exactly welcome there.
• Charles wants to know why the dead Daniel looks so familiar. Ellie returns, and after closing her son's eyes, she coolly tells Charles her plan. Charles' hand rests upon her stomach as they talk and quietly says "not in your condition." Looks like Daniel is already on his way. "Love can be complicated," Richard says of the couple. Oh brother. After she reminds Charles who wears the pants in this relationship, Ellie starts leading Jack, Kate, Richard and a scruffy guy to the bomb. Kate tries to take off, accusing Jack of trying to get them killed. A shot rings out, Kate's eyes get wide, and I am WAY too excited about the possibility of Kate being dead. So much so that I'm a teensy bit let down to see Sayid, and that ain't right.
• Richard is not happy that Sayid killed Scruffy Guy, but Ellie is firm in her resolve to take them to the bomb. It's pretty obvious who fancies herself this era's leader. Sayid finds out that his plan to kill Ben didn't work, and if looks could kill, then my wish for a dead Kate could have come true. Kate gets pretty sanctimonious about what qualifies as "ok" for someone who blew up her dad and drugged and abandoned her husband. When Jack says that this plan is their chance to change things - that it's their destiny - she calls Jack crazy and bolts. To be fair, this plan IS pretty crazy, but my Kate hate trumps my common sense.
• Lost's underwater camera gets some work as Jack and company swim to the "tunnels." Hieroglyphs abound, and there's a great exchange about how they're going to get the bomb out. J: "I assume you don't mean through the pool." R: "It's a twelve-foot-long, 40,000 pound hydrogen bomb. No. Not through the pool." The "dumbass" was silent. Ellie arrives, then Sayid. He thinks that Ellie may want to use the bomb simply to blow up Dharma, but Jack trusts her anyway. After much excessive torch lighting, there is, in fact, a bomb. Now, what to do with it? NOT THROUGH THE POOL.
• MEANWHILE: Sawyer and Juliet are being interrogated. Sawyer wants his lawyer, and Nerdburger clocks him. Horace the wimp is relieved of his leadership position when he objects to the brutality. When Nerdburger half-heartedly shouts "tell me what I want to know," Paul lets out a loud "PFFFFFFFT." Translation: "you ain't no Jack Bauer, Nerdburger." When Sawyer won't talk, Phil hits Juliet. SON OF A BITCH! Then Phil calls Hurley the fat guy, because no one's brought THAT up in a while.
• And what's the fat guy doing? Shoving cookies and canned goods into a bag. He, Jin and Miles are taking off for the beach when Chang catches them in the act. He grills Hurley, who claims to have been born in 1931, that the Korean War never happened, and that oh yeah, they ARE from the future. Miles admits that he is Chang's son. Sadly, the reunion is kind of cold. Chang, convinced of impending doom, heads back to security to announce his evacuation plans. There, KING NERDBURGER, LORD OF ALL HE SURVEYS, DECLARES THAT THERE SHALL BE DRILLING. Is it wrong that I'm glad he dies? Sawyer, mustering up what remains of his own leadership skills, pushes for the evacuation by agreeing to talk. In return, he and Juliet get on that sub.
• As the women and children head towards the sub, Miles finally realizes that his mom's resentment towards his dad was a mistake: he only cared about their safety. Then Miles spots Sawyer and Juliet. For a moment, before Sawyer tells the island "good riddance (time of your life)," I fear that something might go wrong. He might be shot from behind. The submarine might blow up (LOCKE). Smokey might decide that it's a good day for a swim. But somehow... Sawyer and Juliet both get on the sub. They are going to buy Microsoft and bet on the Cowboys, and they're going to be rich. Most importantly, they will be together and off the island, with a fresh start. Those three long years allowed them to fall in love with each other, and now they're free. It's beautiful. Then Kate shows up, sweaty and panting and staring at Sawyer, and I have never hated her more. The sub dives.
• IN THE PRESENT: Richard is playing with a ship in a bottle when a woman arrives and says: "he's here." He is Locke, who has brought a boar. Richard thinks there's something different about him. "I have a purpose now," Locke says. I think I used to have a porpoise. Sun wants to know what's going on and who Richard is. Ben says, "he's a kind of advisor... and he has had that job for a very, very long time." Richard drops a bombshell when Sun asks if she remembers her husband and friends: "I watched them all die." Eeeeep!
• Sun sadly looks at her wedding ring. Locke swears that he will find a way to reunite everyone... if it's possible. Ben swears he won't stage a coup with his former people. I am skeptical. Locke, Richard and Ben head into the jungle, and Locke demands to see Jacob. Ben is incredulous at the size of that man's cojones. As "the leader," Locke insists that Richard follow his order - right after he takes everyone to the plane. Oh hey, it's the scene from Because You Left! After Richard leaves to tend to... uh, Locke, Ben asks Locke, "how did you know when to be here?" "The island told me." The Ben/Locke power play continues, and then Locke tells Richard that no, really, he died. Richard looks momentarily confused, but hey, it's Lost, so he accepts that statement and moves on.
• They walk back to Locke's people, where Sun is anxiously waiting. Locke doesn't want to sleep: he wants to see Jacob now. But first: a speech. He wants to stop all the Jacob secrecy and take everyone to see him "right now." WE'RE OFF TO SEE THE WIZARD! Richard is not amused or impressed by this turn of events, and says "I'm starting to think John Locke is going to be trouble." Ben declares Richard late to that particular party but offers him a festive hat and a piece of cake anyway. "Right now" turns out to mean "in the morning," as the sun is shining when the group sets off. Ben, ever the troublemaker, swears his allegiance to Locke, who rewards his loyalty by revealing that he intends to kill Jacob. WHATWHATWHAT???

Congrats, Trent Reznor

Today, the news broke that Trent Reznor is engaged. When it did, you could almost hear the internet groan with the efforts of frantic Nine Inch Nails fangirls - and boys - who wanted to find out more about the woman who captured Trent's heart. Her name is Mariqueen Maandig. She sings and plays the harmonica (among other things) for the band West Indian Girl. She has great taste in music, including Lamb (one of my all-time faves), Massive Attack and Queens of the Stone Age. She's beautiful.

And most importantly, she makes Trent share thoughts like this via Twitter:

"...thank you all for the kind words regarding my (formerly) private life. Being happy feels funny. I like!"

As an angst-ridden college kid, I loved this lyric from another band: "if I don't let myself be happy now, then when?" I still love the song, but now I let myself be happy. It sounds like Trent feels the same way. Congratulations indeed. Let's celebrate later this month at Charter One Pavilion!